Hello 2012!!!

It’s supposed to be good bye 2011.

But hey, I’m just being forward looking so I already want to welcome 2012.

It’s 8:20 here while I’m typing this so there’s about 3.5 hours before we say hello to 2012.

I am really, really hopeful about the new year.

No more of the past. A fresh start. A new beginning. Ahh.. I can taste it now.

I am thankful to God because I know that even though I’ve missed His point for so many times, I can still sense His goodness and mercy to me.

This is where I am basing my hope for 2012 and beyond.

There are so many things that are out of my control but one thing that is undeniable is how God is really in complete control of everything.

No, I won’t say that I have reached that full understanding of God. There are tons of things that I don’t understand. I grumbled and crumbled. I complained and I blamed. But despite of it all, I can’t seem to escape God’s deeper grace.

Grace, in the sense that He knows that I am but dust. He knows how helpless I am on my own, how powerless I am without His protection. And so, I have seen  His invisible hand, working quietly to protect me.

I’m reminded of the song So Close by Hillsong. The bridge says, ” All along You were beside me, even when I couldn’t tell. ” I believe that has always been true of me. His protection, His guidance, His commitment to me has always been constant. He is indeed ever faithful.

This truth gives me courage and confidence to face the new year. I am claiming my inheritance. I will fight for my inheritance. I know that God is more than willing to give it to me.

Hello 2012!!!

Merry Christmas!

december musing

The year is about to end.

I can’t really look back without any tinge of disappointment for this year. My consolation though is that I made it through.

Good news is that I can look forward to the new year. His mercies are new every morning. I don’t know why it’s hard for me to claim God’s promises.

From what I understand in this verse, regardless of whether it was your own fault or due to some circumstances that were out of your control that brought you to where you are right now, God’s mercies will make it possible for you to start anew and move forward in life.

There’s a big reason why the bible says to forget the past. Because really, you can do everything that you like but you will never, ever be able to undo the past. The best thing to do is to look up to God and ask for His grace and mercy.

I don’t believe that God would rub your mistakes in your face. I believe that He is gracious and loving and not surprised at our weaknesses. He is a very present help in times of need.

As for me, I really need this message of grace and mercy. I’ve been in a bad cycle for years and getting out of this has been my struggle. I battled with hopelessness and deep discouragement. But I still dare to believe that there’s more in this life than misery.

I am hopeful about the coming year. Double portion for my lost. Beauty for ashes. Joy for pain.

i want more.

Thrive (Switchfoot)

Been fighting things that I can’t see in
Like voices coming from the inside of me and
Like doing things I find hard to believe in
Am I myself or am I dreaming?

I’ve been awake for an hour or so
Checking for a pulse but I just don’t know
Am I a man when I feel like a ghost?
The stranger in the mirror is wearing my clothes

No I’m not alright
I know that I’m not right
A steering wheel don’t mean you can drive
A warm body don’t mean I’m alive
No I’m not alright
I know that I’m not right
Feels like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

I come alive when I hear you singing
But lately I haven’t been hearing a thing and
I get the feeling that I’m in between
A machine and a man who only looks like me
I try and hide it and not let it show
But deep down inside me I just don’t know
Am I a man when I feel like a hoax?
The stranger in the mirror is wearing my clothes

No I’m not alright
I know that I’m not right
A steering wheel don’t mean you can drive
A warm body don’t mean I’m alive
No I’m not alright
I know that I’m not right
Feels like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

I’m always close but I’m never enough
I’m always in line but I’m never in love
I get so down but I won’t give up
I get slowed down but I won’t give up

Been fighting things that I can’t see in
Like voices coming from the inside of me and
Like doing things I find hard to believe in
Am I myself or am I dreaming?

No I’m not alright
I know that I’m not right
A steering wheel don’t mean you can drive
A warm body don’t mean I’m alive
No I’m not alright
I know that I’m not right
Feel like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

I want to thrive not just survive

Another year for me

The good thing about being 28 is that you’re not yet 40.

I remember back in 2005 when I was invited to speak  in a symposium for English major students in PNU, I met this guy who was my co-speaker. At that time, I was 22 and he was 27. He said that when he was 20, he thought that he was old but when he reached his age, he realized that he was still really young and there’s still so many things that he could do in life.

Well, I can honestly say that I now understand what he meant. Back in my early 20’s, I really felt old. I can’t really explain it but maybe it was more of my mindset. Because now that I’m nearing 30, I can actually say to myself to slow down. Of course, looking back, I can see where I should have been more thoughtful on some important issues in my life. I’ve made decisions, good and bad, that brought me where I am today.

I can’t say that I’m satisfied where I am now. No, I’m not. I don’t want to settle for less. I feel that I’m more hopeful now compared before. The sense of urgency is there but not to the point of freaking out. Mistakes were made but God gives a greater grace.

FIBA Month

I would say that it was a rather a succesful campaign to say the least although it didn’t come without any heartache.

Successful because we placed 4th, which is the highest in 24 years.  But heartbreaking because we lost to the eventual silver medalist Jordan in the semis and if it wasn’t enough, we once again were beaten by our tormentors, Korea, in the battle for bronze. It was a won game, but yeah, we lost.

We started with a 2-1 record, losing to China by 15 pts. The last time we battled them was in 2002 Asian Games, and we lost by 41 points. I didn’t count the FIBA 2007 because China only sent their Team B. We beat that team by the way.

We swept the 2nd round by defeating  Syria, Jordan and Japan. We were stacked against Taipei in the quarters which we beat handily . Then in a game where we were expected to win, Jordan played with cruel intentions in the 4th quarter to seal the deal and booked themselves for a date in the finals against China.

The game against Korea in the battle for third was actually a good game for the Philippines, that is in the first 38 minutes of the game. We were practically leading the whole game when Korea suddenly exploded for 35 points in the 4th, good enough to win the game by 2 points.

It was really a heartbreaking loss for us. It wasn’t like we were blown out by 40 points, but we had the game, we just needed to hold our grounds but failed to close out the game. Well, that’s basketball. You always need to play 40 minutes of ball. Wew.

The result of our campaign should compel the leadership to lay down a long term goal to ensure that we will once again gain our  rightful place atop of  Asian Basketball.

An old dance piece revisited

Rose Ann posted this on my FB wall. Pretty nostalgic. We danced this song more than a decade ago. Yeah, time flies… can’t find any other vid on youtube.

 

*** This is not us. Just can’t find any other vid.

a month in review

I practically spent the whole month watching Korean dramas and movies. I think I’ve already finished about nine movies and four dramas. Take note, dramas last for at least 16 episodes. One hour per episode that is.

Since I haven’t adjusted my body clock yet, I’m awake all night so I spend it just watching.

Korean dramas are a breath of fresh air to me mainly because I’m not familiar with their artists. Not like here, I really don’t have that big of an interest in following any particular TV Series locally.

Anyways, let’s see what else they have in store for me.

 

…

It feel that it was the right choice at that moment.  I really can’t tell for now but I feel that I’m not gonna regret it. But I don’t know really.

Ever said something that made you cringe in regret after saying it?

Yeah, the feeling is not really good.

There are things that are better left unsaid as they say. The thing is that words when spoken, have the power to cut through the person’s soul, either building it or destroying it.

It takes character to control yourself from saying things that are unnecessary especially in the heat of the moment when let’s say, you’re angry.

I don’t think it’s bad to speak your thoughts out. It’s your right. However, within the context of dealing with others, I think having the wisdom of saying the right things at the right time wouldn’t hurt at all.

There’s a lot more to learn indeed. **Sigh

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